Happy Rules

Happy rules

Be at the Center of Your Network

In a recently released study of the social networks of more than 4,700 subjects who had been tracked for 20 years, researchers found that happy people tend to be linked to each other through relationships with family, friends and neighbors. Not only were there clusters of happy and unhappy people, those at the center of their networks seemed more likely to be joyful, whereas those on the fringes were more likely to be melancholic.

Obviamente no se refiere a redes sociales como MySpace, HI5 y otros que más bien producen frustración, envidia e ira entre los usuarios.

Se trata de construir redes de amistad, confianza y apoyo entre personas de carne y hueso que se conocen principalmente de la escuela, del barrio o en familia.

Surround Yourself with Happy People

The same study also demonstrated that happiness is contagious--you can even catch it from a friend of a friend. The researchers found that happiness removed by three degrees can make you more content than an extra $5,000. The same domino effect is true for unhappiness, as well, though the researchers believe negative feelings spread more slowly than positive ones.

Quien quiere estar rodeado de gente frustrada, enferma o desanimada? La mayoría de los políticos utilizan este tipo de personas para conformar sus grupos y grupitos.

Lideres de esa categoría son personas infelices y solo traen infelicidad a quienes les rodean.

Si yo emito ‘buena vibra’ todo el tiempo y donde quiera que voy tendré mas posibilidades de recibir de regreso mas y buenas ondas, sonrisas, afecto, admiración y respeto.

Watch Less TV

A recent analysis of time-use data from the General Social Survey showed that while Americans enjoy watching television, doing it too often may lead to unhappiness. Dr. John P. Robinson, a professor of sociology at the University of Maryland who conducted the research, found that unhappy people watch over 30% more TV per day than very happy people. No similar disparity was found in comparing all other activities, including sports, churchgoing and socializing.

No es una coincidencia que desde diciembre 2008 no tengo televisión y que justamente desde entonces deje de fumar.

El exceso de TV especialmente noticias, series de crímenes y telenovelas producen ansiedad y depresión.

El exceso de navegación en la red produce los mismos efectos.

Cada hora frente a la televisión constituye la perdida de oportunidad de conocer o comunicarse con otro ser humano.

Lead an Active Life

Not only do happy people watch less TV, according to a recent study, they also spend more time socializing with relatives and friends, attending church, reading the newspaper, working and even having sex. It's difficult to tell whether or not these activities are a function of happiness or if the activities lead to happiness, but the study's author, Dr. Robinson, says contentment is definitely linked to an active lifestyle.

Me levanto muy temprano, digo mis oraciones, hago los ejercicios, me meto al mar, luego al trabajo, y de regreso al agua y a comer bien. Luego lectura, sexo y a dormir bien.

Manage Your Time Wisely

Surprisingly, research shows that Americans don't feel any more stressed or rushed than they did in the 1980s, according to Dr. Robinson. But using time unwisely--having too much of it or not enough--was recently correlated with increased levels of unhappiness. Robinson, who conducted the study, found that 51% of unhappy respondents felt they had too much time, compared with 19% of those who felt very happy.

La duración de la comunicación telefónica al mínimo, ver o conversar con personas desagradables, enfermas, frustradas o desanimadas debe evitarse o restringir al menor tiempo posible y en todo caso transmitir alegría y optimismo. Voltaire decía que la mejor forma de tratar a nuestro enemigo es que el sepa que somos felices.

El tiempo más sabiamente invertido es el que pasamos con nuestros hijos y padres.

Find Ways to Cope

Unfortunate things happen in life, but that doesn't mean they have to permanently diminish your mood. Dr. Sonja Lyubomirsky, a professor of psychology at the University of California, Riverside, has studied happiness extensively and has found that developing an effective coping strategy is key to overcoming most troubles. There's also no single way to cope, though she recommends trying to develop strengths you didn't know you had--like the ability to manage a household budget in the midst of a financial crisis.

Enfrentar el éxito como el fracaso y tener presente que el uno puede llevar al o ser consecuencia del otro. La sonrisa y la cordialidad hacen un buen chaleco para mantenerse a flote en aguas turbulentas.

‘A mal tiempo buena cara.’

Set and Pursue Goals

Goal-setting has many benefits, says Dr. Lyubomirsky, also the author of The How of Happiness: A New Approach to Getting the Life You Want. First, goals give us a sense of purpose. Second, they tend to cultivate self-esteem, since the sense of accomplishment can segue to feelings of confidence. Finally, they add structure to the daily routine of life, which Dr. Robinson's findings on time-use revealed can be an important component of long-term happiness.

Las metas y los sueños ambiciosos pero alcanzables. Que te haría más feliz? Regar una planta todos los días para que se convierta en un hermoso árbol que fructifique o, hacer abrir un agujero en la tierra y mandar a plantar un árbol maduro que otros sembraron e hicieron crecer?

Don't Think Too Much

In her research on happiness, Dr. Lyubomirsky often encounters a behavior known as self-focused rumination (in other words, obsessing over the unknown), which many people believe might lead them to clarity or resolution. But according to studies conducted in the past 20 years, such behavior actually fosters biased thinking, impedes concentration and diminishes a person's ability to solve problems. Breaking this habit can be tough, but Lyubomirsky recommends distracting yourself with engrossing activities.

Mi amigo Danilo siempre decía que lo perfecto era enemigo de lo posible. Don Miguel Ruiz dice: “Haz siempre lo máximo que puedas” y yo diría: deja de pensarlo y hazlo de una vez por todas. Algunas personas esconden su inseguridad (que produce lógicamente ansiedad y sufrimiento) con la cobija de ser pensadores analíticos.

Practice Gratitude

It sounds like a New Age mantra that has little grounding in science, but being grateful can change one's mood, habits and health. A study conducted by Dr. Lyubomirsky required a group of 57 participants to write down five things for which they were grateful once a week. A second group of the same size did so three times a week. A third control group of 32 did nothing. Six weeks later, participants in the first group were happier, healthier and exercising more.

En primer lugar hay que dar ‘gracias a Dios’ todo el tiempo. En segundo lugar es importante agradecer y manifestar el agradecimiento hasta por las cosas mas insignificantes. Ayudar, apoyar, compartir, dar son fuentes de alegría y felicidad. Esperar las ‘gracias!’ por lo que hacemos o la reciprocidad por lo que damos es minar nuestra felicidad.

Experiment With Happiness

If the so-called secrets to contentment don't exactly work for you, try another version or interpretation of the guidelines. You may not have the same success with a particular strategy as others do, says Dr. Lyubomirsky, because achieving happiness doesn't happen in a uniform way. Instead, think of it as a sliding scale on which some methods work better, while others make little or no difference.

La búsqueda de la felicidad no cuesta un solo centavo. Muchos no buscan la felicidad porque creen que van a gastar mucha plata, confundiendo felicidad con el placer.